Saturday, 24 March 2012

#ItGetsMeMadWhen I don't know where I stand with people

I've never been good in choosing my friends...
They say that high school is the best time of  your teen year and in my case it is the worst shit I've ever had to experience and I'm glad that I only got 3 months left..
For a couple months ago I blogged about my school and it's people, so there is no need to explain why I can't wait to get out of here...

But one thing I must say: "A failure is a lesson learned"

I used to think high of my school and had my girls by my side then everything turned upside down.
All of these girls had a some sort of a lover and I was the only single lady left so every now and then I would be  bombarded with talks about their boyfriends and guys they were dating and this is something all girls do... Talk about guys and such!

Somewhere in me there is this feminist that pops up at time, and back then I was tired of boys and was a single lady and hating and hating on every creature with a penis :O
In the beginning of the second year it became a trend to break up and everyone were breaking up, so it didn't get any better when my ladies were getting heartbroken by these douchebags.
As the supportive friend I am I supported them and was their should to cry on when they all were breaking up with their guys and I told them that life goes on and that they should take one day at a time and start enjoying their own company and enjoy being single.

I somehow made it clear to them that I wasn't in a rush to find a boyfriend or whatever, cause being committed to myself made my life a little less complicated. And so I was marked as the man-hater single lady,  I sure didn't have no problem with it, but they did and that's why they used to tease me saying that I'm snobbish and heartless, now these were the same "friends" I used to laugh and have fun with..

Real friends know you, so real friend would know that this was a phase I was going through - hating on them men  -.-
But NOOOOO this was obviously a part of my personality as they expressed it -_-
At the time I met Alexander I didn't even bother telling them that I was dating this amazing guy, I didn't get to talk about him the way they used to talk about their boyfriends... Cause they were busy being miserable about guys who left them, guys who didn't want them and guys they wanted.
When they finally found out that I was dating, words were thrown in my face:
"You said that you'd be single for the rest of your life"
"You were as desperate as us all, you are no better than us"
"How can you go against what you stand for?"
"How can you call yourself a single lady?"
"You were the founder of the group single ladies and now you are leaving it for a guy, how ironic"
 - and the list goes on...

With time they got it in to their system that I now had someone in my life, but still today not a single day pass by without them mentioning how I deceived "the single lady thing" if I mention my boyfriend -.-
Recently they had a problem with me talking on the phone with Alexander, saying that I spent a lot of time talking to him because it was like me seeing him everyday which obviously wasn't good, now mind you that these girls ex's lived close to them (like real close)and they got the nerve to say that I spent way too much time on the phone with my boyfriend who I have a long distance relationship with.. THE HELL?
Saying that it is no good for me clinging to him, now what do they know about that huh?, had they listened to me talked about being in love and supporting me the way I supported them when they were in love - they would understand why I spend so much time talking on the phone with him.
Matter of fact, I do not have to explain myself - real friends understands!!!

Funny thing is that they used to be obsessed with their boyfriends and I wouldn't say a thing cause I just assumed that, that was love. They somehow felt the need to justify their relationship, but I would always say "There is no need to"  If you are in love you are in love, and if it makes you happy to be with that one person 24/7 then do it no need to explain, those who care will understand and those who don't understand don't care...

If they all were still together with their Ex's this whole situation would be different.

- The question is how real are these friends of mine?

I think I need a new circle of friends with some positive energy and friends who are able to celebrate my joy and keep me grounded.
- Three months I say to myself... Three months, cause y'all ladies are superficial

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